Progress Report

Officially five weeks post-LPAO now, and there is more good news to report.

I have been to the gym three times since I got the green light to start last Tuesday. Getting on that bike and moving my blood around feels so good after a month of basically being sedentary. I have fewer restrictions on my movement than I did at this point last time, plus I got started going to the gym the day after I got permission from the doctors, so the mood-enhancing effects have already begun.

At the gym I have been riding the stationary bike for 30 minutes on the "random" setting, with a highest resistance of about 6-8 (out of 25 available on the bike). It may not sound like much but after my RPAO I had to start at zero resistance for 10 minutes, and work up from there. Plus, my cardiovascular endurance totally disappeared during my month of the Couch Workout, so 30 minutes at level 6 has me breathing hard enough already! But I'm looking forward to improving on that front as well.

I've also done some upper body work at the gym (although with all the crutching, I don't think I've lost that much strength) -- lat pulldowns, rows, chest presses, etc., but I've been pretty lackadaisical about it so far; must step it up a bit.

Interestingly, I just realized that I -- completely coincidentally, without having gone back to check my post-RPAO entries -- quit my pain meds at exactly the same time post-LPAO *to the day*. Amazing! So yes, I quit my pain meds today, exactly the same way I did at the five-month mark last time: I woke up with very little pain, and figured, hey, why not give it a shot?

One of the reasons I decided to go off the pain meds now was that I wanted to feel pain as the warning sign it is. Now that I am putting more weight on the left leg, and using one crutch at times, I don't want to push things too fast simply because I've numbed the pain and don't know that I am putting too much strain on the joint. But so far, so good. What pain there has been is minimal and tolerable and subsides if I give my hip a rest for a while.

So now I am pharma-free, except for aspirin (allowed to quit next week), fiber, and calcium. I sleep well on both sides. My incisions look great. My only niggling problem is that tight spot on my spine where the epidural was, although I don't feel it nearly as often now. If it is not gone by next week I'll let the team know.

One Month Post-LPAO

Today was my one month post-op appointment with Dr. Millis and the team. I already had a feeling my left hip was healing faster than my right hip had earlier this year, but my appointment today confirmed this.

I got the standard x-rays before seeing the team: supine AP and false profile. When I went over the films with Erin, she pointed out the areas of bridging -- where the bone had begun knitting to fill the cracks. My bones have done a spectacular amount of knitting in the past month! The cut in the illium was barely visible (except the big gap to fill caused by moving the acetabulum), and the other two cuts were bridging nicely. I'll try to get the films so I can post them. Both Dr. Millis and Erin were impressed.

I reported that I am down to two Percocet a day, one in the morning and one before bed; Valium occasionally as needed. That strange pain (that I thought might be a ligament) is completely gone now. I still take one Atarax at nighttime. I am sleeping much better now, able to sleep comfortably on both sides now, as well as on my back. I still have the strange pulling feeling at my epidural site, so Erin told me to let them know if it got worse or continued much longer.

Erin did my range of motion tests and they were good as well. My hip can bend below 90 degrees towards my chest now and rotation was good. My straight leg raise was high and strong, too, which I think is because I was in good shape going into the surgery. I think if the muscles around your hip are strong going in, it can only help in the recovery.

When it came to movement, I admitted that I'd been putting more weight on the leg this past week. Erin had me walk with one crutch and then a few steps without crutches. One crutch felt OK but without crutches I definitely felt that sinking feeling you get when the leg is not ready to take the weight yet. So I am officially allowed to start using one crutch, but always keep the other around in case I need support or my gait becomes uneven "like a penguin," to quote Erin. Great news, huh?

I am allowed to go to the gym now, with far fewer restrictions than I had post-RPAO. I can do the stationary bicycle at zero resistance to start, as usual, but I can increase duration and resistance faster this time. And I can do any upper body and core exercises I want, provided my hip feels fine when I'm doing them. This is great news because the faster I can start getting back into shape the better; I'd rather not lose as much fitness as I did after the right hip surgery.

It is amazing how much different this recovery has gone compared to my recovery in March. Other women have said that one hip is always worse than the other, but you never know which one will be the bad one. Imagine if this one had been worse than the RPAO! But luckily it is going fantastically so far, and I'm feeling really great. But I doubt I would have appreciated the speed and ease of this recovery as much if I hadn't had such a rough go of it in March.

So good news overall, but there's still a lot of healing to do. I am going to try not to get overexcited about this progress, and continue to take it slow and steady so I can keep knitting away as well as I have been. I return to see Dr. Millis and the team in four weeks (Dec. 29), but I'll update here before then, to report on how the new weight-bearing and gym visits are going.

Recovery Day 1 -- So Far So Good

My first night in the hospital after the surgery was also a fitful, fractured one. Just as during my hospital stay in March, all my machines kept thinking I was dying in one way or another -- no heart rate, no pulse oxidation, no breath rhythm -- and so the beeping started and stopped all night and thus, so did my sleeping.

Every time I woke up I felt as if a large chunk of time must have passed since the last awakening... and yet the clock had hardly moved at all. I can honestly estimate that I woke up every half hour last night because of beeping, itching or a nurse taking vital signs.

One thing that did not wake me up was pain. The epidural has been handling my pain really well; I've been at a zero on the pain scale so far. This time I don't need a CPM machine, either, because apparently it is not necessary if the surgery does not go into the joint capsule.

My recovery so far is already going better than it did after my March surgery. Although I am still plagued with itch problems (as a side effect of the pain medication), having the use of both my arms to move my body around using the trapeze pole above the bed makes it possible for me to lift myself off the bed so my back can be cleaned, my sheets can be changed and towels can be laid underneath me. Hopefully all these precautions will help keep me cool and dry so I can avoid the heat rash situation that so plagued me in March.

So by midday today I was pretty content -- zero pain thanks to my epidural, clean sheets thanks to my two working arms and my lovely nurse, and itching suppressed thanks to Nubain. And so, contentedly, I slipped into a nap.

Only to awaken with a start some time later to find seven doctors crowded around the bed in my tiny room, staring at me, clipboards in hand. I fumbled for my glasses as one of them began to make introductions and ask me questions. Putting my glasses on did not help focus my thoughts; instead it only made me see in frightful clarity that I was indeed surrounded by doctors with clipboards staring at me, awaiting my answer to the pending question that, in my panic, I had not heard. I was paralysed and made idiotic by the surprise and my self-consciousness, and so when I did start talking, I answered most of their questions vaguely and certainly unhelpfully. By the time I regained (a scrap of) my composure, it was all I could do not to laugh when I realized six of the seven were obviously rigidly earnest interns trailing a resident on rounds. (Hey, I watch Grey's Anatomy, I know what's up.)

Not to be a diva or anything, but that bed-crowding scenario was NOT OK with me. I have no problem with a teaching hospital, or with a resident coming into my room with interns to use me as a learning example. But I do not want to be woken up from delta wave sleep to find seven people in lab coats clustered tightly around my bed, scribbling on clipboards. Once you get over the initial shock, it is creepy, and then plain rude. So I politely asked my nurse if in the future I could be warned, and if necessary, awakened, before a med school field trip took a tourist stop at my room.

Incidentally, the seven doctors with clipboards were from pain services, and after having a discussion that was ostensibly with me, but really amongst each other, they decided to put me on Narcan for my itchiness. Never mind that I was already taking Nubain and Benadryl, both of which were doing the job well for me.

A bit later, PT came by to do some exercises. This seemed as ridiculous to me this time as it had when they came the day after my surgery in March. What could PT possibly think they were going to get done with me one day after major hip surgery? Apparently not much: move your feet up and down, clench your buttocks together, etc. But I guess it is never to early to start moving again.

Unlike in March, this time I seem to have an appetite during recovery. Today I ate a fruit salad and a bit of soup, which seemed to make everyone happy. Drs. LaRue and Millis came in to check on me separately during the evening; both seemed satisfied with my progress so far. And of course Dr. Millis stopped the Narcan as soon as I told him it wasn't doing anything for me and that the Nubain had been working just fine, because he's logical like that.

Left Hip PAO -- The Surgery Itself

For the most part, today* was much like Surgery Day for my right hip PAO. Same fitful night of sleep, same chilly walk to the hospital, same admitting and pre-surgery procedures.

This time, however, I had a cold. It seems like I never really got back to 100% healthy after that cold I had in late September after my first autologous donation. As you'll recall, I had a mild cold during/after the first autodonation, and an oncoming sinus infection during the second and third.

And then two days ago I began to have a sore throat. By last night I could tell that I definitely had a cold (or maybe even a continuation of that same unconquerable sinus infection? Please, don't let it be that!). I was very nervous that today's surgery would have to be postponed, which would have been a logistical nightmare.

Last night I tried to get a good long night's sleep (perchance to heal myself of the cold overnight?). Of course that was not to be, and I had a horrible, fitful night filled with nightmares about the surgery being cancelled, interrupted only by the frequent need to blow my nose.

This morning, the pre-surgery procedure was pretty much the same as it was with my right hip PAO in March. Mom and I walked over to the hospital. I had my vitals and other checks done at admitting. I mentioned there that I had a mild cold but the admitting staff didn't seem too concerned about it as long as it wasn't a cough/chest problem.

Because I had waited around at admitting for so long, by the time I got up to the surgical floor, my medical team was waiting around for me. I didn't even get a chance to change into my surgical pajamas before Dr. Millis signed my hips, his resident Dr. LaRue introduced himself and talked about the surgical strategy, the nurses came to check various things, and the anesthesiologist gave his explanation of the procedure. I did tell them that I had a mild cold but they, too, said they'd be more concerned if it were a chest/coughing cold with fever than the nasal congestion cold I had.

Then the anesthesiologist injectected me with the loopy-loo sedation medication and I was wheeled in to the OR at 7:50. I do remember joking around a lot in the OR as the team prepped me and placed my epidural. I remember there was music playing in the background and I asked what kind of music they were going to play while they operated on me. He asked what I wanted and I told him definitely no heavy metal, as that might make him go overboard with the saw. I think I eventually settled on Händel's Water Music.

While I was in surgery, my mother got regular updates on my progress. At 9:30 Dr. Millis had started in on the left hip, and by 11:00 he was cutting bone. By 12:30 he was putting the screws in on the left side. At 14:15 Dr. Millis was preparing to take the screws out of my right hip. Finally at 15:30 Drs. Millis and LaRue came out to tell my mother that I was all done and the surgery had gone well. He also gave my mother a baggie with the five screws that had come out of my left hip. Souvenir!

Dr. Millis did mention that my superhuman bone density had surprised him once again -- this time he was prepared for how difficult my bones were to saw through, but he was not prepared for how tightly my bones would adhere to the screws in my right hip during the past seven months of recovery. Apparently they had a heck of a time getting the screws out!

He also explained that this left hip surgery was somewhat less invasive than my right hip PAO had been, since my left hip was in better shape going into the surgery than my right hip had been. This time they did not have to open the joint capsule or detach the head of the quadriceps muscle. Also the femoral head did not need to be shaved and shaped for better alignment this time either. Thus the surgery itself was faster and my recovery will likely be quicker and less painful as well.

While Dr. Millis was giving this auspicious news to my mother, I was in the recovery area, awakening from anaesthesia in what felt like the throes of death. I felt like I had hypothermia, and I was shivering so violently that it would be more appropriately termed convulsing. I was also gasping for breath, literally gulping huge lungfuls of air but still feeling as if I could not breathe, as if I was drowning. I was given oxygen and was covered in hot blankets over every inch of my body like a heated white burqa. I remember pleading with them to stop the shaking; they ended up having to give me a horse's dose of Demerol to calm it.

By the time my mother came into the recovery room to see me, I was breathing normally and my convulsions had been reduced to chattering teeth and an occasional body shudder. I was still covered in blankets as they brought me up to my room. I was given some Nubain for the itching and promptly fell asleep.

*Obviously, I did not write this post on the day of my surgery. I wrote it a few days later, but post-dated it for chronological consistency.

Recovery Day 3 - My Back is Covered in Magma

Today my linens were changed again, but this time Dr. Millis himself was smart enough to be there for the actual changing -- I think he knew I'd throw a fit (because last time I was so nervous about the moving around and the sea-mammal-lifting scenario) and that my pride would probably cause me to suppress my panic in front of the head of the orthopedics department and therefore allow the deed to be done. Again I question why my linens needed to be changed less than 24 hours since their previous change. But anyway.

There were a lot of people around (male and female nurses); Dr. Millis was distracting me by talking about various unrelated things and giving me various meds while others were messing with the bed around and beneath me. So it all went far less terribly this time than my apprehensions had suggested. It also helped that my left elbow had healed enough that I could lift myself with its help from the trapeze, unlike last time.

My epidural was also taken out today, which was far less painful than I'd anticipated it would be. I suppose the epidural itself inside my back was quite small -- although I will say that it did affect how you could lean back in your seat, it had to be just right or it dug into your spine in quite the wrong way. A bigger coersion to removal was the tape around the epidural site and wires -- it itched crazily (a trend, you will see). But all went well and the epidural came out just fine and left almost no mark, as the hole in my spine had been so tiny. The epidural delivery system itself had been off since the morning anyway (meaning no medicine had been flowing through) as I was transitioning from that delivery system to my new oral meds.

The real, very distressing concern I had with removing the epidural had nothing to do with pain. Without an epidural (the wires for which had kept me in bed since the surgery), I no longer had any need for a urinary catheter, and without a catheter, I'd have get out of bed to use the toilet. (Sorry, I'm going to have to discuss catheter territory here...) So far, I hadn't had to get out of bed for anything, and, because I had a the luxury of a catheter, I'd kept myself very hydrated, drinking tons of water in addition to the IV fluids I was receiving on a 24 hour basis. I happened to be on the phone when the nurse who was sponge-bathing me mentioned something in passing about removing my catheter and began fussing around down in the catheter area. (Red flag just on its own.) Hold the phone, literally. I was not about to fall for that little she's-distracted-by-the-phone diversion trick. So I got off the phone and launched into a little whining parade, asking why I couldn't just keep the catheter until I learned to get out of bed safely. But I guess catheters are often the source of infection and so they should come out as soon as possible. Given the fear I'd already acquired about moving (even just enough to change my linens), and the amount of fluids I'd been drinking (consequence-free due to the catheter), I was actually prepared to accept the risk of a UTI (everyone likes cranberry juice, right?) over a constant (one-legged) Tigger-like bed to bathroom bouncing cycle. Alas, mine was the minority opinion and so the catheter too came out.

This meant that by Thursday afternoon I'd become almost totally wireless -- no leads, no epidural, no catheter, no IV-drips (although the IVs were still in place should they need to be hooked up to something or other).

This would all have been excellent progress except that Thursday also suffered from a timing problem. The day was supposed to have gone like this: get wireless, get a pint of my own blood transfused (for extra pizzazz!), get out of bed with PT's help, learn to use the rolling commode chair to get to the bathroom, rest on laurels. But instead, something got delayed with the blood and the schedule went more like this: get wireless, wait for the pint of own blood, inevitably have to go to the bathroom but no more catheter and no training in how to get out of bed (because PT wouldn't come until after I've gotten my pint of blood, of course, which makes perfect sense in Nonsense Land). For bathroom breaks I was forced instead to choose between pissing myself or using a bedpan, both choices I had planned to put off until at least my mid-80s.

The bedpan required me to hoist myself up on the trapeze, a nurse to position a plastic bowl-type thing beneath me, me to lower myself onto it and try to pee in it without missing and pissing all over my bed (which of course, could have been an option on its own, as you recall). Lots of people have to help set this bedpan scenario up for you and so you are not exactly left with any modesty while performing the task. It is mortifying and disgusting beyond belief, and honestly should be someone's episode of Fear Factor. Personally, I chose to add in the optional pre-bedpan temper tantrum (which does not lessen the bladder's needs) before succumbing to the bedpan option. I did, however, maintain what I thought was a shred of dignity by countenancing a complete, unabated, immature and utterly satisfying fury for the remainder of the day, and going on a water strike. All of which, I'm sure, showed them.

When you think of fury, you imagine, perhaps, Yosemite Sam's ruddy, seething face beginning to shake, or the way Acme characters' faces fill up red from the bottom until the very pate is reached and "TILT" begins to flash in their eyes. I am not going to say that in a similar manner my bedpan humiliation fury was physically manifested by the pulsing, hot, Habanero-like heat rash I was to suffer for the remainder of my hospital stay, but I'm not going to deny the metaphoric coincidence either.

As you may recall, during my feverish period described yesterday, my back would pour sweat and feel like an inferno, and I would stuff as many ice packs as possible back there to try to alleviate the situation. All that heat and pressure (despite the ice packs) eventually lead directly to a horrible, spreading, angry heat rash that inspired absolute insanity in me, removing my concern for hip pain, consideration of others, desire for food, drink, life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness and replacing it with a frantic desire to rip the skin off my back with any available shredding and/or rending type object(s). This frantic heat rash condition could be controlled slightly with various anti-itch medications, but would become a background tenet of my mood for the remainder of my stay.

So needless to say, Thursday was an angry day. Not only were my linens changed again in some sort of spasm of sadistic cleanliness, my back began to boil like a hot, itchy pool of magma, my catheter was removed before I knew how to get out of bed, and my dignity was stolen and beaten and ridiculed and tossed into a bedpan in front of male nurses.

On the plus side, I did get to have a shower.

Recovery Day 2 -- Fail Whale

After a good night's sleep last night, I continued the Sleeping Beauty trend through most of the morning, confounding many of the various medical team visitors that came by in the morning intending to work with/on me and finding some sort of hibernating, mumbling creature in my bed.

My lucky epidural/Valium/nubain combination certainly did treat me well through the night and this morning, but when I finally woke up midday I had two problems. One was that my shoulder muscles, having been kept in the same position for two days and nights straight (because of IV lines and injury), were stiff and very sore. The second was that Phlebotomy had not been deterred and was waiting for me to wake up. Seriously? Are they playing some sort of sick darts game with me? Didn't I just give them blood samples yesterday? I was unable to feign sleep well enough to discourage them, so they stuck me again and again and again until they they finally found a vein that could give them what they wanted.

By now all the evil forces amassed against me had noticed that I'd awakened and so I was cheerfully told it was time for my bed linens to be changed. Last time I had checked, I had been lying quite immobilized on my bed linens, tangled up to several types of wires, hooked to a CPM machine, and basically inextricably attached to my bed and, therefore, its linens. I also did not particularly care that my linens were at this point a day-and-a-half old. I don't even change my sheets at home every day and a half. But the hospital cared, and so I was -- strongly against my will, I note for the record -- forced to have my linens changed.

The linen change operation can best be pictured if one imagines how one moves a large sea mammal -- an orca, say, or a manatee -- from one tank to another at Sea World. A big sling is positioned under the enormous beast and then is hoisted; the animal is lifted, fins flopping out to the side, pulleys straining, as the tank is hurriedly changed or cleaned beneath the teetering mass of blubber. Finally, thankfully, the hovering sense of disaster is abated as the humiliated and panting celaphopod is lowered back down to its bed -- I mean, tank.

My CPM machine was not replaced after the linen change, since I'd had the machine on and constantly running since immediately post-surgery. This meant that my operated leg was in a new position and that a pressure sore that had, gradually and, at the time painlessly, been created by the support bar of the CPM machine against the underside of my thigh, had begun to make itself known as the sedation masking it wore off. Quickly and excruciatingly.

Physical therapy came and did some mild exercises with my legs and feet; I ate some broth. All the while the pain from my new positioning increased, the pressure sore began to liken a red-hot poker pressing into my thigh, and, somehow, the epidural began to decrease in effectiveness (despite being raised from 8 to 10 by Dr. Millis last night.)

By late afternoon I was probably at a seven or an eight on my pain scale, moaning and crying and repeatedly pressing the nurse call button to beg hysterically for help or a shotgun. Unluckily, my mother was out taking a walk at this point, so I was literally alone, sobbing into the abyss and the nurse call walkie-talkie.

The pain began above my hip, probably where the screws entered my iliac crest just below my waist on the right side. The pain widened and deepened at the hip joint itself, illuminating all the different moving parts aching inside the joint and around it, including the muscle along the outside of the hip joint. The pain then shot down the right side of my thigh and flared out again near the lateral tibial head, narrowing and dissipating down the lateral side of my right calf. This pain was steady and totally consuming, and I couldn't figure out why it would radiate out so far from the hip itself.

I cried and moaned and hit the call button again and again. Finally, FINALLY, a nurse came and brought Pain Services, who discussed my pain and did some sensory tests to determine the coverage area of my epidural. The Pain Services team eventually decided to raise my baseline epidural to 12 and to give me a jump start on pain relief by injecting a small dose of lidocaine directly into my epidural line. Although it was not instantaneous, the lidocanine did the trick and provided me with possibly my first (and only) pain free 90 minutes while in the hospital.

Once the lidocaine kicked in and my biggest crisis was resolved, some of my smaller irritations could be addressed. I'd been feverish all day, so my body temperature had been fluctuating between chills and hot flashes. When I was hot, I was dripping sweat and had to be packed around with ice packs all over me; when I was cold, I was swathed in blankets and chattering my teeth. When I was hot, my back would itch and drip and feel like an inferno pressed against the pillows and the bed, and I would stuff as many ice packs as I could between myself and the bedding. My fever hit 102 at its highest. My back itched and overheated horribly, only worsened by the enormous ace bandage dressing wrapped around my incision as well as my entire abdomen.

Needless to say, this was an incredibly uncomfortable day. I was in pain and/or discomfort almost constantly, as well as woozy for long portions when I was on Valium to help me relax and Nubain to help relieve the itching.

At 6:30pm Dr Millis came by to remove the large ace bandage dressing and replace it with much smaller dressing over the incision alone, which relieved some of the abdominal discomfort, but not the horrible itching and damp heat on my back. I saw my incision through the stitches and steri-strips -- it looks about five inches long and not horribly disgusting. Dr. Millis said my fever was normal. He looked at the pressure sore from CPM machine but declared it didn't look that bad, which was annoying since it certainly continued to *feel* that bad.

I ate my first food (some bites of scrambled eggs and a few crackers) so I'd be able to start switching to oral medicines in the next day or two.

I would have to say that today, Wednesday, was one of the very worst days so far, and that I am surprised and disappointed that I was so very uncomfortable and painful several days after the surgery. I didn't expect the recovery to be pain free, but I certainly did not expect the seemingly increasing level of durable, multivalent misery that I would be still be experiencing several days following the surgery.

Recovery Day 1

Last night -- the night after my surgery day -- was rougher than I thought it would be. Despite being exhausted after the surgery, I kept being snatched from the edge of sleep by various distractions, both human and electronic. Nurses came often to check my vitals, and oversensitive monitors periodically became convinced that I was no longer breathing, which of course sounded an emergency alarm that brought people running to my unnecessary rescue. My sleep was fitful from all the interruptions, and uncomfortable because of the itchiness brought on by the epidural medications and the all the contraptions stuck to and moving on me.

In my bed, I was sleeping with two IV lines, three monitor leads, a pulse oximetry meter, rhythmically inflating compression leg wraps on both lower legs and my entire right leg in a continuous passive motion (CPM) machine cycling my hip constantly between 30 and 70 degrees. Cozy.

The 11pm nurse shift change brought relief in the form of a wonderful nurse who gave me Nubain (for itch) and Valium (for muscle relaxation and sleep) among other delights. I slept much more comfortably after that but I wouldn't call it cozy.

This morning Dr. Sankar came to see me as I awoke, and he said I looked very well for someone the morning after surgery. Phlebotomy followed Dr. Sankar, which caused me to mar my fine looks with a considerable scowl, as they pincushioned me for some blood tests. The scowl deepened when I found out these would be daily blood tests.

Then the physical therapist arrived, which I honestly thought was a joke. Seriously, how much physicality did they think they were going to be able to get out of me in this state? A toe wiggle? Well, that was pretty much the answer. Wiggle your toes, move your ankles, etc. They did ask me to isometrically tighten the quadriceps muscle in my right (operated) leg as much as I could. It was a strange sensation to be sending my leg muscles signals that simply did not seem to be received. The therapist laid her hand on my thigh and said she could feel my muscle contracting, so my efforts were not unheeded, but I was still numb to any response at all and the non-feeling was quite bizarre.

I spent most of today sleeping, probably making up for my poor night's sleep last night. In the evening the anaesthesiologist checked on my left elbow injury -- I still couldn't use it to help lift myself using the trapeze (the pole above my bed that can be used to lift and adjust the body using the arms) and I still did not have full extension or flexion. The pain was tolerable if I kept the elbow relatively still, but it was obviously a concern for the surgery team.

Dr. Sankar also came by in the evening to remove my "drain," a pair of tubes that had been left in the wound and led out to a collection pouch outside the body to drain away blood and fluid from inside the surgery site. The drain reduces swelling and aids in healing, and had been emptied several times since I'd gotten to my room on Monday night.

When Dr. Millis came up at 7:45pm, my last visitor of the night, he asked what my pain level was in my hip. I told him honestly that it felt like I had a machete driven through my groin. He thought this a sufficient enough reason to increase my baseline epidural from 8 to 10. The machete became a steak knife and the night passed relatively peacefully.

The Surgery Itself

My mother and I made the chilly, five minute, pre-dawn walk to the hospital. Right on time at 6:00am I made a point of bounding up the hospital stairs towards the Admitting department, ticking off my last "last" before surgery. In the Admitting area there were three other patients with their families checking in for surgery. All of them were kids, except for me, which I guess is to be expected at a children's hospital. They were, alternatively, sniffling and clutching a teddy bear, silent and affectless, and moderately cheerful. I was actually a bit jocular and excited, which seems an utterly inappropriate mood with which to approach major surgery.

By 7:00am we were all in the pre-op holding area, a room lined with curtained off alcoves, like stalls in a barn. In my "stall" I changed into my surgical "johnny" gown and met with the anaesthesia team. They reiterated everything that had been discussed about anaesthesia during the pre-op meeting in February.* In some PAO blogs I'd read that some patients had experienced problems with their epidurals where the wrong leg was numbed, or the epidural did not work at all. When I mentioned this to the anaesthesiologist, his answer seemed to be something like: "yes, that happens sometimes; it is tough to pinpoint the right spot; we are actually working blind in there because we are not going to bring in a fluoroscopy for a simple epidural, but we do these all the time so it should be fine." Oh, OK, now I feel better.

Dr. "Woody" Sankar came to sign my hip and Dr. Millis, sporting a green St. Patrick's Day bow tie, stopped by to answer last minute questions. He estimated he would be done with the surgery by 1:00pm. After the doctors left, the anaesthesiologist gave me "something to relax" through my IV -- I don't know what it was but it hit me almost instantaneously.

Quickly thereafter, at 7:45am, I was wheeled into the operating room and my mother was taken into the family waiting room. I didn't have my glasses on anymore, but through the fuzz I saw that the OR was full of a lot of people, a lot of tables and a lot of stuff on the tables, everything in the blue/steel/white color palette that looks so good with my complexion. I also remember thinking Dr. Millis' surgical cap was not at all like the caps the surgeons wear on Greys Anatomy.

My gurney was wheeled close to another bed, which had been piled with pillows or cushions of some kind, and I was told to swing my legs around so I was sitting on the side of my bed resting my shoulders, forearms and head on the cushions. "Try to make your back into a 'C' shape," the anaesthesiologist said.

Wait just a minute, I thought. This is the procedure for getting an epidural. I am not supposed to be conscious while getting an epidural. I am not supposed to remember this part. I am way too conscious for this. Meanwhile people behind me are telling me what a great spine I have and what a wonderful "C" shape I've made with it, and Dr. Millis and his strange surgical cap are right in front of my face talking about things completely unrelated to how overconscious I am during this epidural placement. Dr. Millis is holding my hand and the man behind me is saying "this is some local anaesthetic, just a small pinch," and I recoil from the not-small pinch and am told to hold still. At which point I think, oh God, this epidural thing really going to blow and I am far too conscious!!, but then it just a bit of pressure and it is done. The man behind me asks me if it tingles on the right side or the left side of my spine and I tell him it is the right side and I am conscious enough to know and be relieved that the right is the correct side for this epidural to work.

So then many hands help put me on my back on an operating table, and Dr. Millis puts this fleshy plastic face mask over my nose and mouth and I remember he was talking to me and holding my hand and I was frustrated because I wanted to answer but I couldn't because of the windy face mask. And then I was gone.

Since seeing me off by the operating room door, my mother had been waiting in the family area. At 9:30 she was told that all was going well and that my surgery had begun at 8:45. By 11:00am the doctor had begun making cuts into the bone but had not inserted any screws yet. By 12:30pm the doctor had discovered the superhuman bone density of my skeleton and was still cutting bone and was now estimating two more hours of surgery. By 3:20pm the doctor was almost finished and was closing the incision, but the nurse said he would not come out to talk to my mother until I was awake and moved into my bed in the Post-Anaesthetic Recovery Unit (PACU).

Meanwhile, I was coming to in the PACU in what should have been relatively pain-free awakening from general anaesthesia. Unfortunately, during the surgery my left arm had been placed in a position that normally would have been comfortable but in my case was not. The left arm had two IV lines, an arterial line and a blood pressure cuff on it, and was stretched out straight across a table, supported with pads and gel packs. Despite all those protections, my left elbow somehow hyperextended, causing straining or microtearing of the tendon attaching my biceps muscle to my radius.**

I can't even remember if I had any hip pain at all when I woke up because all I remember is excruciating pain in my left elbow. My cries utterly confounded the PACU staff who were (understandably) under the impression my hip was my most likely pain locus. All I recall from this period in the PACU is whimpering and moaning and leaking tears as people tried to figure out what was wrong with me. No conclusion was ever really reached, but I was given morphine anyway, which helped a little.

At 4:10pm Dr. Millis came out to the family waiting area to speak to my mother. He said the surgery had gone well, and that I was out and awake and feeling no pain in the hip, but that I was feeling pain in my elbow. He also mentioned that I had very strong bones, which was why the surgery took longer than expected. Dr. Millis showed my mother films taken during the surgery as the bone was cut, moved and after the five screws had been inserted. The doctor showed a comparison of my pre- and post-surgery hip socket angles -- my pre-surgery angle was 90 degrees and the goal for the surgery had been to increase the angle to at least 110 degrees. The post-surgery angle was actually 114 degrees, so Dr. Millis was obviously quite pleased with that outcome.

You can see the increased coverage of the femoral head ("ball" of the joint) in the image to the left. Compare my left and right hip socket coverage and it is obvious how much more of my right femoral head is in the socket compared to the left femoral head. Obviously all my new hardware is quite visible as well.

The doctor also mentioned that he had not used all of the pints I'd autologously donated prior to surgery, since most of my blood replenishment during surgery came from the cell saver system. But he would probably be using some of my donated pints to ease my recovery in the next few days.

At 5:30pm my mother came to see me in the PACU. I was already on morphine for the elbow pain, so my hysteria had lessened slightly at this point. She fed me ice chips while I kept trying to clear my throat of the breathing tube feeling. While she was there Dr. Millis and Dr. Sankar were adjusting my CPM machine, which I would use for the next few days.

At 7:00pm, twelve hours since I'd first hit a gurney, I was wheeled into my room on the 10th floor. Luckily, I had a private room with a lovely view. I didn't spend much time enjoying the view, though, as I was exhausted -- from the surgery, the sedation, the pain, the morphine, everything. I think I was asleep by 8:00pm.

* All quotes and dialogue attributed to medical staff at Childrens' Hospital are taken from the memories of my mother and my(drugged)self, and should not be considered direct quotations or perfectly correct paraphrasing.

**This is my diagnosis, not a doctor's. But I still think it is right.

Pre-op Appointments

Yesterday I had my pre-op appointments in Boston with the various hospital departments and Dr. Millis' team. Everything is now go-for-launch.

It was quite a full day, especially since my mother and I drove up to Boston and back to Connecticut the same day. Seven hours in the car plus five hours at the hospital minus one pint of blood equals exhaustion.

ADMITTING

First appointment of the day was with Inpatient Admitting. I met with a nurse who did (another) full history and vital signs, and discussed the surgery process with me. Not the actual surgical procedure, but the process surrounding the surgery.

On the day of the surgery I am to arrive sans jewelry, colored nail polish, tampons... basically nothing foreign on or in my body. Last meal must be 8+ hours before surgery (so basically dinner the night before). The nurse advised me that one should make sure one is not constipated coming in to the surgery because one gets more constipated from the anaesthetics. Also best not to have a big meal the night before because you will regret it when you wake up after surgery and throw up everywhere because you ate too much the night before.

After the surgery I will go to recovery and then my room. They can't promise me a private room since I am a low priority for a single room (i.e. I am not carrying an infectious disease or something of that nature) but they told me they would not put me with a child. Even though it is a children's hospital they do treat adults (obviously) and so I'll get an adolescent or an adult roommate, if I have one.

Admitting is the department I go to for check in on the morning of my surgery. Since my surgery is scheduled for 7:30am, I will get to admitting at 6am and they will make sure I have followed all the guidelines above. They will also check vital signs and blood before sending me to the surgical floor.


ANAESTHESIOLOGY

I met with a member of the anaesthesiology team, but he is not necessarily going to be my anaesthesiologist on the day. We discussed my options, which were basically general anaesthesia and a) epidural or b) PCA ("pain pump," where you administer your own pain medication by clicking a button on your IV line). I chose epidural because I'd rather have a steady flow of medicine from pre-surgery through recovery than having to pump my own medication and get "behind" on the pumping while sleeping, etc.

The epidural is inserted pre-surgery (but post administration of sedation and pain medication such that I am not really conscious of the epidural insertion). After the IV line is put in and I'm on relaxy meds, I will have to lean forward and make my back into a C, like in Pilates. That opens up the spaces between the vertebrae and makes it easier to get the epidural in. They assure me it won't hurt very much at all, but if the actors on Grey's Anatomy are anything to go by, that is a big fat lie.

Once the epidural is in, I will be put completely under with general anaesthetic, my breathing tube and urinary catheter will be inserted and the games begin.

After the surgery I will come to in the recovery area and will apparently be very thirsty and dry of mouth, due to the breathing tube having let my entire mouth/throat system dry up throughout the surgery. I will also apparently be nauseous (hence the light meal the night before).

The epidural stays in for three days, after which I will be switched to whatever oral cocktail of painkillers works best for me for the remainder of my stay. The hospital has a "pain service," as the anaesthesiologist put it, so my medication can be increased/adjusted 24 hours a day, whenever I need it.


INSURANCE

In pre-op admitting, you sign most of your necessary consent forms so you don't have to do it the day of the surgery. Consent/understanding of risks for anaesthesia and the surgery itself, naming of a proxy in case you can't make decisions on your own (gulp), acceptance of financial obligation if insurance doesn't pay for your surgery.

Insurance itself is, for now, a non-topic. My insurance (Blue Cross) has covered everything so far, and apparently the hospital's insurance department has already begun the process of getting my surgery approved and covered. They'll get in touch if they need me. So no news is good news in this department, I suppose.


BLOOD DONATION

During pre-op admitting, one is usually sent to the phlebotomist for some blood work, but because I was also doing an autologous blood donation yesterday I only had to get stuck once for both pint and vials.

On February 9th I gave my first autologous blood donation at the New York Blood Center in New York. I'd never given blood before because I always feared that my horrible, very bad, no good veins would be even worse if you tried to squeeze a pint of blood out of them. At the New York Blood Center, I was wrong. The guy found a vein somewhere in the marble blankness of my arm, got the line in with minimal pinch, and the blood came out so fast that I felt quite unwell and nearly passed out.

At Children's Hospital blood center, it was a different story. When I got to the blood center, my blood pressure was apparently 80/60, which is pretty low (standard is 120/80), and my nurse was concerned and told me to pound a bottle of water and try again. The next measurement was higher, though, and so the attempts with the needle began. The girl got a line in, but the blood was coming out SO slowly. And she had to keep moving the needle in the vein to restart the blood flow when it waned. Needless to say it was highly uncomfortable. Although the plus side of blood dripping out of me slowly is that I didn't practically pass out from the blood loss like I did in New York.

I have one more autologous donation on March 2nd in New York and then I am done. Hopefully I will get Mr. Expert again; I'll take a little syncope over a needle-wiggling drop-by-drop eternity any day.

When I donate in New York, it is shipped up to Boston. I had to donate at least one of my three pints on location in Boston, because it needed to be separated into platelets and plasma right away for concentrated injections during surgery. Shipped blood apparently cannot be separated in the proper way.

At my first blood donation, my iron was 14.6. In Boston yesterday it was 12.5, even though I'd been taking iron supplements in between the donations. Twelve is a normal reading, so I am not low, I just need to continue with the supplements and the iron-rich food through the next blood donation and up until the surgery.


PHYSICAL THERAPY

I met with the physical therapist who will be working with me during my week in the hospital, and monitoring me during my recovery. She taught me how to walk on crutches, which was not really new considering I was on them for a month just a year and a half ago for the tennis injury. I remember them all too well.

The physical therapist said I should expect to be on crutches for three months after the surgery. I have heard varying reports from other women who have gone through this surgery, so it is clear that the length of time one is on crutches (as well as every other variable in this process) is highly individual and contingent, and so difficult to predict with any useful accuracy.

I was also told I needed a special raised toilet seat, a shower chair and a wheel chair. Honestly, I can't see myself ever using the wheel chair, since my parents' house and environs are not very conducive to wheeling rather than crutching. I am most likely not going to have a CPM (continuous passive motion) machine unless there is work done on my femoral head. I will do a more complete list of "things I need" in another entry.


SURGICAL TEAM

Last but most importantly, I met with the surgical team, which is to say Dr. Millis, Dr. Prashant (who I'd not met before but I assume will be scrubbing in) and Erin Dawicki.

We went over the whole morning-of-surgery procedure that I'd discussed with admitting and anaesthesiology earlier in the day. Dr. Millis explained that depending on how it all looked in there when he opened me up, he might need to fix any tear there might be in my labrum or do some shaping on my femoral head if it is needed to help the (newly aligned) joint fit together properly.

Dr. Millis also discussed my left hip. It seems we are going to have to do the left as soon as possible after the right. I recently had some significant pain in the left hip (only) during a walk, which was unusual because it is usually my right hip that hurts first, most, or at all. And when I was on crutches a year and a half ago, my left leg was my "good" leg and took most of my body weight for a month, resulting in severe pain. I am quite certain that as soon as I start crutching around after my right hip PAO, my left hip is going to start complaining loudly. But we shall cross that bridge when we come to it.